


Full of Surprises

by reilaroo



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Newt is not Innocent, Overprotective Theseus Scamander, Smitten percival
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-10-25 02:22:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10754757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reilaroo/pseuds/reilaroo
Summary: “You’re not putting your dirty hands on my innocent brother!”





	Full of Surprises

**Author's Note:**

> I love reading over-protective Theseus stories, so I wanted to try writing one. Hope you like it!

Newt was on his way to Tina’s office when he passed by Director Grave’s office. He paused when he heard his brother’s raised voice. Theseus was visiting MACUSA for Ministry-related business. He had already yelled at several aurors for being too-friendly with Newt. Now, it appeared he was giving the same warning to the director. Like Percival would ever be interested in him, he thought sadly.

“I can’t believe you. Newt is sweet, precious, and innocent!” Theseus yelled.

Newt sighed as he pushed open the door without knocking. Sometimes his brother forgot he was thirty years old and not a five-year-old boy. He looked around Percival’s office and noticed his friend and brother standing a few feet apart. Theseus’ face was red in anger, and Percival looked determined yet embarrassed.

“Theseus, stop yelling at Percival,” he said.

Both men turned to look at him. Theseus tried to look contrite. “I wasn’t yelling at him. I was just explaining things to him.”

“Like how innocent I supposedly am?”

“You are innocent. You have to be protected,” Theseus said. This is why Newt belonged in London, where he could keep an eye on him. He resolved to convince his baby brother to move back to London before his trip was over.

Newt snorted. “I’m hardly innocent. I did fight in the war remember. I’ve seen the horrors of battle. I’ve killed men and watched helplessly as men died beside me, knowing there was nothing I could do to save them.”

“You were very brave during the war; and you never lost your compassion. But that isn’t the kind of innocence I was talking about.”

“Did you mean that my job is innocent? Because I’ve broken more laws than I can count,” he said before remembering he was talking in front of the Director of Magical Security.

“Percival, could you please forget you heard that?” he asked sweetly.

Percival sighed and shook his head. “I already know about your law-breaking ways, Newt. If I haven’t already arrested you, then you can assume you’re safe.”

“Thank you, Percival. Now, where was I? Oh, yes. I’ve run into poachers and traffickers. Sometimes I’ve had to fight them in order to save a creature. I’ve hurt them, and I don’t feel remorse. They were horrible people, abusing those poor animals. So, I’m not innocent there either.”

“Please don’t remind me of your dangerous job. Can we please just forget this conversation?” Theseus asked, hoping his brother would let this go.

“No, you will explain why the two of you were talking about me and what my so-called innocence has to do with it.”

“He said something I didn’t agree with, and I used your innocence as a valid point.”

“Percival, would you like to say anything?” Newt asked. “You’ve been fairly quiet.”

Percival sighed again. He couldn’t believe his simple question had led to all of this. “I’m sorry we were talking about you, Newt. I was nervous about asking you a question and asked Theseus for advice. I didn’t think he would become so angry.”

“You asked me how to put the moves on my baby brother. Why wouldn’t I get mad about that?”

“I did not!” Percival shouted. “I asked you for advice about how to ask Newt for a date.”

“It’s the same thing,” Theseus shouted back. “You’re not putting your dirty hands on my innocent brother!”

Newt pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling a headache coming on. He was surprised but happy about Percival wanting to date him. On the other hand, he was mortified by his over-protective brother’s behavior.

“Merlin’s beard!” he shouted over top of the other men. “Shut up and listen to me.”

Both wizards looked at him in shock; he rarely raised his voice. They ducked their heads and mumbled apologies.

“Alright, now that I know the nature of your argument, I have a few things to say. First, I’m not sexually innocent. I’ve had sex before; I’m not a virgin. So, Theseus, your argument is invalid.”

Theseus stared at his brother in horror. “Who was it? Who touched you?”

“I’m not telling you their names,” he sighed in exasperation.

“Their? There’s more than one?” Theseus asked. He needed to know their names, so he could find them and hurt them for touching his precious brother.

“Yes, I’ve had sex with multiple men and women. I discovered that I’m attracted to both genders. I’m attracted to the whole person, not a specific body part.”

“Multiple men and women,” Theseus whispered in shock. “At the same time?”

“Generally, no not at the same time,” Newt mused with a thoughtful look on his face, “Although there was that orgy in Africa.”

Theseus fainted as soon as he heard the word orgy. He couldn’t comprehend his baby brother involved in such a lewd act. He couldn’t believe Newt wasn’t pure anymore.

Newt looked at his unconscious brother with amusement. He looked at the shocked director. “Now, Percival, I believe you wanted to ask me a question. This might be the best time to ask it before Theseus wakes up.”

Percival stared at both brothers and started laughing. “Life is going to interesting with you, Newt. You’re full of surprises. Would you please join me for dinner tonight? Then we can go to a jazz club if you like music.”

He smiled brightly at him. “I would love to have dinner with you, Percival. I’m quite fascinated by American jazz music, so a club sounds lovely.”

He smiled. “Excellent, I’ll pick you up at seven o’clock.”

Newt leaned in close and kissed his cheek. “I’ll be waiting.”

Percival blushed as he felt Newt’s soft lips on his skin. Before he could respond, Theseus started groaning on the ground. Newt quickly cast a sleeping charm on him and then levitated his body.

“It’s easier to take him back to his hotel room this way,” he explained. “We don’t want to hear any more of his rants. I know he means well but his over-protective behavior is very tiring.”

Percival grinned at his floating friend. Theseus definitely deserved this treatment. He resolved to never under-estimate Newt; the magizoologist was a fully-capable wizard. 

Before he opened the door for them, he had one final question. “Did you really have an orgy in Africa or did you say that to shock Theseus?

Newt chuckled. “It really happened. I was there to rescue a nundu, and the villagers were so grateful for my help that they invited me to join their summer solstice celebrations.”

“And their celebrations included an orgy?” Percival asked.

“Sex magic is used for fertility rituals. They were hoping to have a plentiful harvest, so they invoked sex magic to increase their crops.”

Percival nodded. He understood the logic of using sex magic for a fertile harvest, but he was having trouble picturing Newt in the middle of an orgy. The magizoologist seemed to be so shy and awkward around people. It was part of his charm.

“I really can’t imagine you participating in an orgy. You seem to enjoy being around your creatures more than people.”

Newt shrugged. “The villagers were really nice to me and made me feel welcome. The orgy was fun, and I enjoy sex. Plus, it was interesting to observe the villagers’ traditions and ceremonies. It was an honor to be invited.”

Percival nodded and he opened the door for Newt and said, “I’ll see you soon.”

Newt smiled. “I can’t wait.”

He walked through the auror department with his brother floating behind him. He stopped at Tina’s desk and apologized for missing their meeting. Tina looked at the unconscious Theseus and the smiling Percival standing in his doorway. She could guess what happened, and she was glad that the mutual pining appeared to be over finally.

“Will you be joining Queenie and me for dinner?” she asked slyly.

Newt chuckled. “I have other plans but thank you for the offer.”

Tina smirked. “Enjoy your evening.”

“Oh, I will,” he said. He winked at the director, who was still standing at his door. Then, he walked over to the apparation point. He held tightly to Theseus’ arm and apparated them to his brother’s hotel room.

Percival shook his head fondly as he shut his office door. He hoped he knew what he was getting into by dating the magizoologist. He had the feeling that Newt was going to be worth all the trouble.


End file.
